Lean Green Mommy Machine

Thoughts on health, wellness, living green and motherhood

Boys Will Be Boys


I am the mother of 4 daughters and no sons so many would deem me unqualified to comment on all things related to parenting boys. To be fair, there are many aspects that I probably can’t relate to. I do, however, run an in-home daycare and my general life is about kids even apart from my work.

I do believe there are differences ingrained in each gender that naturally come through. But I also believe within each gender there are various personalities and quirks that can’t be pinned to one gender or another. I don’t believe in boy toys or girl toys or gender specific color.

All that being said, there is one thing that I hear from parents and grandparents of boys that gets my hackles up. Boys Will Be Boys. I think this phrase started out innocent enough. Little Billy chases Susie with a frog and Granny chuckles, saying, “Boys will be boys!” Fair enough. Though, the adorable little kindergarten girl across the street from me is just as likely to be running around with frogs.
The problem with “Boys Will Be Boys” is it has become an excuse to let your little (or not so little) boy act like a complete Hellion and take zero responsibility for his actions. More and more I see boys hitting, spitting, throwing and smashing toys, trying to kick over trash cans at the park, running wild and loud to the dismay of parents who simply say, “Boys Will Be Boys” as if there is no solution to be had for their horrid behavior because having a penis causes them to act like little demons.
The truth is boys and girls are both capable of acting like well-behaved children or cringe-inducing spawn. It comes down to how you CHOOSE to parent. Yes, some kids are tougher than others to manage and figure out. But they aren’t all boys (believe me, I know). We would all be a lot better off if parents would lose the phrase “Boys Will Be Boys” and start teaching those boys how to behave like decent members of society.


Author: leangreenmommy

Hi, I'm Sonia! I'm the mom of 4 wonderful daughters and wife to one amazing man, trying to live a healthier life, care for the earth and just survive the day. When I'm not cooking up new recipes in the kitchen or shuttling kids to soccer, volleyball and lacrosse I run an in-home daycare and am a freelance writer.

5 thoughts on “Boys Will Be Boys

  1. wow – that’s a little tough love right there 🙂 thanks for speaking up tho! I may have to repost 🙂

  2. Pingback: Boys will be Boys – really? | Boy Mom Blog

  3. I agree that it’s atrocious to use “Boys will be boys” as an excuse to allow bad behavior. But I get equally outraged when girls’ parents assume the job of parenting small boys is the same. How do you know that the parents of these boys are not attempting to teach their kids the right behavior? Maybe they’re just laughing it off in public. Children are often calm for their teachers and hell on wheels for parents. Please don’t assume. I’ve met so many parents of girls who had the shock of their lives when they finally had a boy.


  4. Reblogged this on The Two Boys Club and commented:
    And now a view from a different perspective: Are moms of boys taking the easy way out? Thanks to http://boymomblog.com for reblogging this.

  5. I agree. I used some tough words here. But all of it is truly in defense of boys. When people use this excuse for bad behavior it tells others that this is how boys are and there is nothing to be done. This is such a disservice to boys! They deserve better than this. Boys and girls can be equally difficult and fabulous. Growing up, and even after having my first child, the idea of having a boy terrified me because I thought they were horrid, vile creatures because of how much bad bahavior I saw excused as “boys will be boys”. I now have friends with wonderful, sweet boys who have shown me that it is not boys that are the problem.

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