Yesterday I found a great pin on Pinterest (isn’t that really every day, though??). It was this article about ending the constant negotiation and begging from your kids with just three little words. It’s quite fabulous and I plan to use it.
It got me thinking that perhaps I should share three more little words I’ve been using that have been very helpful in getting my kids to listen.
I need you.
That’s them. Three little words.
It’s fairly situation specific but I find it is a situation that happens a lot. I often need my kids to come to where I am. Sometimes so I can brush and style their hair, sometimes so I can tell them what I need them to do. I find I run into a lot of procrastination, delays and dawdling. However, when I tell them I need them, magically it’s as if they are full of some special power that clearly I do not possess and they must come right to me to rescue me from myself.
This has never lost its effect. Me telling them I need them is followed by hair-dressing, instructions to clean up, asking them to fetch me something…yet every time I say I need them, they come right away.
I think they like to feel needed by someone so big, no matter what I actually need them for.
Sometimes I use a variation of those three words. If I am cleaning up the kitchen table for dinner (said table is inevitably covered in arts and crafts), I can tell any one of them, “I really need your help. Can you please…” and just ask what I need them to do and they do it without balking.
Sometimes I think as parents we tend to over-talk things. I know I do. I’m a talker by nature and therefore have created 4 more lovely little talkers too. There is so much value in conversation with your children.
But sometimes the fewer the words the better. All that parental reasoning can be overwhelming for kids (and teens too!).
So maybe give these three little words a try to see if it helps and swing by Positive Parenting Solutions to learn about her three little words that can end the begging and nagging.